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“What if, sometimes, there be mists and fogs so thick that I cannot see the path? It is enough that You hold my hand, and guide me in the darkness; for walking with You in the gloom is far sweeter and safer than walking alone in the sunlight!” -Susannah Spurgeon
Part of fulfilling my job as a nanny includes filling these little hearts and minds with books, songs, stories, and words that drive their thoughts, hearts, and affections to the only righteous One. Here are some of my recommendations for doing so. (Link in bio.)
Lilli was praying while coloring earlier and said, “God, I love You when You’re the same and I still love You when You’re not the same.” • This echoes a lot of conversations we have on a daily basis, conversations of how she is loved regardless of her actions and how we “love you when you listen and we love you don’t.” • “Hey, Lilli, want to hear some amazing news?” • She always does. • “God never changes,” I tell her. “He’s always the same.” • “Wow.” • “How does that make you feel?” • She smiled so big. “It makes me feel really happy.” • “Why would that make you happy?” • “Because I love Him and I want Him to come everywhere with me and if He never changes it means He is always with me.” • She’s three years old. • Solid theology is a comfort for every age. Praise God for His immutability.
“Are you not willing to pass through every ordeal if by any means you may save some?” -Charles Spurgeon

Follow me as I follow Jesus

Talks of Heaven and Napping with my Grandmother


Snuggles with my grandmother in 1989.

On Sunday I took a nap with my grandmother and we had a heart-to-heart. I haven’t taken a nap with her for years and years… since I was a little girl who didn’t recognize the importance of such moments.

With cancer wreaking havoc on her 78 year old body, I’m trying to memorize every moment with her. I’m just afraid she doesn’t have a really long time left on this earth (but, then again, how do we know any of us do?).

The reality of her shortening time with me hit home real hard Sunday when I went upstairs to grab a new book and ended up laying beside her in bed. I know it will be one of my most treasured memories with her.

We talked of heaven and how exciting it will be.
Of seeing Jesus’ face.
Of eating without thinking of calories.
Of uncorrupted taste buds.
Of the glory of God.

“Yes,” she said with a tear-filled voice, “There are much worse things than death.”

“For a believer,” I added.

“Yes,” she nodded, as a tear slid across the bridge of her nose. “I was actually talking about me.”

My tears came then.

I’m so thankful for Grandmama Jean and for the opportunity, though painful for both of us, to see her finish well. To watch her praise God though cancer is tightening its grip on her is a testimony to God’s work in her life and just how far He has brought her.

I wish my sister could be here in Colorado with us. She has always been Grandmama’s pride and joy and I know she aches to spend quality time with her before she reaches her heavenly home. I’m praying she gets to do just that before all we’re left with are memories.

But oh what great memories they will be.

Yesterday morning: spending time with God and my grandmother. Such a precious time.

Yesterday morning: spending time with God and my grandmother. Such a precious time.


11 comments on “Talks of Heaven and Napping with my Grandmother

  1. camilliamadden says:

    I wish I was there too. I miss her so much. I havent wanted to intrude on her rest, or healing, not knowing what is right or would be hurting her is a hard place. I love her so much. She is my pride and joy of a grandmother. I hate time. I hate sin. I hate cancer. Im so thankful for Christ and our hope that surpasses all of them.

  2. Tammi Burgess says:

    Great article Sophie! After losing my dad suddenly 2 year ago to cancer, it opened my eyes to how precious time is with family and friends………Time is the best gift you can give anyone! Enjoy each day with her that God gives you all. Praying for you all! love you!

    1. You’re so right… life is definitely a vapor. Thanks for your sweet comment. Love you!

  3. Juliana Reed says:

    Hope your having a good time on your vacation! I miss you already!! ❤

    1. I miss you too, little baby! Can’t wait for next week to see you!

  4. Hannah Hamilton says:

    so sweet. lord, preserve us like grandmama jean!

    1. Exactly my prayer, Hannah! Miss you!

  5. Katie says:

    “We talked of heaven and how exciting it will be.
    Of seeing Jesus’ face.
    Of eating without thinking of calories.
    Of uncorrupted taste buds.” I am so happy to have found your blog today. Praying for you as you grieve and cherish. This topic is near and dear to my hearts. She will soon feast extravagantly on and with Jesus.

    1. Katie, thank you so much for taking the time to comment. That last sentence made me cry all over again–what a glorious thought. The feast we were all made for will soon be hers.

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